Deeper Than Face Value

Ok this NEEDS to be addressed....

Before I began to blog about whats currently on my mind, I first wanna take time to say that in NO WAY am I trying to offend the people who are currently in this situation. I am just speaking my mind on the subject just like anyone would

Now...Lets begin...

I understand that I am getting up their in age..I'll be 21 in Aug (The 17th to be exact)..And I recognize that people around me are getting older also..So with older age, comes older choices and responsibilities..But WHY is it that I keep seeing our young AFRICAN AMERICAN woman pregnant or with child at ages 17-22?? At first, this didn't really bother me because it was subtle back in 2008. But during the past 2 years it seems as though their has been a SERIOUS "Baby Boom"...Kids are being born left and right... Don't get me wrong..Any child is definitely a blessing from God but what ever happen to wrapping it up? Pulling out?? Or just not having sex at all (Trust me, its possible). With most instances, I'm seeing "baby mama" pics without a father in sight (That's Dead)..

It cant be JUST me seeing this or even thinking this way...Im sorry but its turned from an "accident" or (God forbid at our age) "Planned" to a serious epidemic that NEEDS to be discussed..

Sex (At our age and outside of marriage) is the leading cause to relationships going BAD. Yes sex is healthy in a relationship (WHEN YOUR MARRIED), Don't get it twisted and try to justify it. When your having sex with your BF or GF, your IN the "baby makin business".. So sweetheart, don't be all shocked when you miss your period. And Sir, don't act surprised when you get that "late text" or that "Uhmmm...Baby..I think we need to talk", because you ALREADY know whats coming..If your in the "business", don't be shocked at the "product" you helped produce...

We need to slow down...

This is something that has been on my mind for QUITE some time now
Blog is for the ladies =)

How many of you females find that time and time again, you end up with a brother that seems like he is ONLY tryna get in your pants? Things seem great at first and the future is looking mighty bright, but as weeks (maybe months) pass by, the conversation leads more towards a sexual agenda more than an emotional agenda. After a while, the relationship spirals outta control and the "Break Up" occurs. OR, you both are SOOOOOO in love with each other, that you give sex a try. THEN after time passes, he doesn't seem to try as hard anymore. Doesn't do the things he used to. Say all the sweet things he did in the beginning. Or even take you on dates that seem like he put a lot of thought into them (blown face) lol.

Yes the guy may have some issues. But most of the time, I find it being the females fault for the detrimental outcome of the "relationship".

Waitttt wait waiiitttt lol...Before you click the back button and continue surfing the web, hear me out. Have you ever stopped and actually LOOKED in the mirror?

My Observation: Most females that end up in those kinds of relationships are the ones giving off the wrong signals from the jump. First impressions are LASTING impressions, and no matter how much a guy gets to know you, that first impression sticks (Confession of a Male Mind). Think about it. When you first met him were you wearing something like leggins, short shorts, skin tight jeans, low v-neck with your breast showing, xs cami with a push up bra, or ANYTHING that would ACCENTUATE and Respectfully COMPLIMENT your body?? As a young African American lady, its knows that you are blessed with curves that normally would drive the male hormones crazy. Now if something like THAT was the first thing he saw you in, his first and lasting impression of you quickly turns into his conscious or subconscious Motive.

Every guy has a motive, and don't let any guy tell you he doesn't. Its the difference in positive or negative in the motive that can make impact. After seeing you in an outfit that ACCENTUATES your body parts, his motives could EASILY be "Mannn what I would do to hit that". He may not even know he is thinking it. And the "relationship" that you two build could be built on top of two different motives. Basically starting the timer for the explosion in which is your break up. The whole time he might seem like the sweetest guy and you probably wont even see signs of him wanting to get into your pants until intimacy (through making out) is introduced into the relationship. Then comes "The sex talk" or what I'd like to call "The game plan", and later..BOOM...Sex...

So ladies if you ever wondered why you keep running into the same type of guys that always seem like they want whats in your panties, take a look in the mirror and think deep

You are what you advertise

Love is somethings SERIOUS...

Lately (Past few weeks), I honestly feel like I've been involved in some kinda free agency. Kinda like what Lebron went through. And with the home team (My ex) rooting for a contract extension, I was being offered some pretty great contracts by other teams (Other females). I must say, A lot of what the other teams offered sounded very promising and things looked amazing....On the OUTSIDE...My blog is titled "Deeper than face value" for a reason. Simply because I look at EVERYTHING in life, deeper than it's "face value".




Background: Growing up, I wasn't necessarily considered someone blessed in the physical appearance department. I was never given the opportunity to be with the most gorgeous females in my class or let alone have a personal relationship with them. But of course I tried..And of course I failed lol...Over time, and through maturation, my physical appearance evolved into what you see today. I still wouldn't consider myself the best looking thing out there, but I can say that I'm approached with relationship opportunities from some pretty attractive females

Fast Forward: There are alot of amazing woman in this world...Some who have been hurt..Some in search of love...And some who just want to be treated the way they have always desired.. Ive come across them all...And like Lebron, I was offered (Either consciously/intentionally or unintentionally) some amazing deals... Those teams had ALOT of benefits...And the potential for happiness was pretty promising.. I know those teams were genuine with their offers...

But just like Lebron, I am choosing my "contract" without any further discussion with any other "teams"...It looks obvious to some what I am going to end up deciding..And yes, Ive told a few close friends my decisions as to my future...

Unlike Lebron, I am choosing to stay with the "Home Team"..And Im willing to sign a lifetime contract just so I can win tht championship(s) and wear that "ring"

Free Agency over...Decision made...
Story Written...

Is it just me, or has "Sin" become more acceptable in our society?

I used to remember a time when most people were hesitant to commit sin. Fearful of God's judgment and what would come of them "In the end". But as I grow older, I notice everything is more sinful. Its a normality that we fall into because we are busy "tryna fit in". Its EVERYWHERE around us. Stores, music, friends, jobs, schools, even our government. No one has a monopoly on moral truths anymore. And reasoning is ALL off.

This distorted reasoning has brought about CHANGE in people's vocabulary, thus making the "act" or "sin" more acceptable. The word "sin" is rarely used in serious context. It's become the butt end of jokes...Smh... People no longer "live in sin" they say they just "live together". They are no longer "Adulterers", they are just "having an affair". Its no longer called "homosexuality", its now "An alternative lifestyle".

I'm not one to "bash" your lifestyle because I struggle with personal decisions every day. I'm confronted with sin all the time, and honestly I fall into it sometimes. But I don't disregard the fact that it is actually sin, and try to make it ok...

All I'm tryna say is get hip..And recognize exactly WHAT your doing..Our days are surely numbered, and if you don't know by now, you need to get hip QUICK! I wouldn't wanna be one of those people left behind..Like the book series...Real Talk...

Peace&Love

I feel it important to write a "DISSclaimer" as my first blog. My blog will embody all (or most) of my thoughts, situations in my life, past events, emotions, religious beliefs, or even spoken word/poetry. At ANY point if something I post "seems" it may be about you, don't be offended. I will never state ANY names and I won't discuss the issues of my blog with anyone if its dealing with your (or my) personal information. This blog is an informative blog, but also a way to keep record of what "goes down" in my life.

DISSclaimer- The act of not being held for your personal feelings due to content that may cause you to feel offended, or in better terms "dissed".